Shambavi Mahamudra: My life's miracle

" Negative emotion is just the indication of your temporary separation from source" - Abraham Hicks.

I'm opening with this particular statement because I have experienced this truth. When I finally decided to embark on my journey of inner exploration, my emotions were horrible. I was going through a nasty breakup from a toxic relationship that I had held on to for way too long. It was hard for me to let go because I thought that was the best relationship I had been in, yet the way it ended showed me how I was living an illusion. I was so sad that my facial expression yielded to this feeling, whenever I was outside people would ask me why the long face. I was tired of these emotions, I just wanted to feel better. 

I was very eager to start inner engineering. This time I didn't care how much it costs, I just wanted to stop feeling whatever I was feeling. In January 2022, I took the completion course with a certain sense of surrender. I gave myself completely to the program with an open mind. I didn't care if it was going to be difficult or not, all I cared about was changing how my body was feeling. It was an intense program, and I had to set aside a whole weekend for it. It finally happened, I got initiated and learnt the practice.

From day one of doing it, I literally felt fireworks. An immense feeling of contentment and gratitude swept my body, and I was overwhelmed with joy. As I continued doing the practice, I realized that happiness is not something to aspire to, it is a fundamental quality. Every day I woke up I felt a fresher sense of joy, and I wondered why I used to be in pursuit of happiness. I was simply overjoyed for no particular reason. I would be in a matatu looking outside at the trees and people and things, and tears would come to my eyes. The simplest things would catch my attention. I would see a spider, or any other small insect and feel immense gratitude and joy just being in its presence. This was very strange to me. Before, whenever I saw any type of bug around my house my first instinct would be to kill it. With continued practice of Shambavi, I have so much love for small insects and all animals. I never used to be an animal lover, I hated them simply because I could not communicate with them. This feeling changed completely. I also dropped drinking alcohol. This was a big miracle for me. I dropped it in a weird way, I had no craving whatsoever and when I tried drinking with friends, the drinks didn't sit right with me. This is when I knew I was making significant changes in myself.

In this wonderful state of being, I met a guy. I immediately noticed how I had attracted a different kind of person than I used to. We had a strong connection, so we went with it. After a while, I realized this was a distraction from my journey of self-exploration. My daily practice required a lot of discipline from me, and this new relationship was a huge distraction. During the period where I was to practice twice a day for 40 days, I was missing my 2nd practice on most days. I did what I had to do, but looking back, the relationship I had with this guy was short-lived, but also the best experience I had ever had in a relationship. 

I had to let go of it. If you have ever attempted inner engineering, you may also have experienced how difficult it can be to maintain the discipline of 40 days. I was finding it somehow difficult until I decided to make it a competition between me and my best friend. It worked very well. Every time I felt lazy for the 2nd practice, I would remember how my best friend is doing it and I did not want to lose. This strategy worked wonderfully well. 40 days passed just like that. Afterward, it was almost as if the practice had been imprinted in our DNA. We now practice effortlessly on a daily basis. It has become like a craving. Because we have seen the benefit of it, it is impossible not to practice. 

Nowadays Negative emotion seems to be a thing of the past, so long as my daily practice is done. It is a practice that helps us connect with the source of creation within. This connection is the most important thing because it is who we truly are. Do you know who you are? The only way to find out is to find your inner being or the source of creation within. Once this connection is found, everything is different. The very way we perceive the world shifts from the limited self of body and psychological accumulations, to that of the unlimited source which knows everything and is pure positive energy.  If you Exist with a connection to this source of creation you will only know well-being. 

One who is connected to source is better than millions who are not. - Abraham Hicks